Shark Shirt

So mum and dad are going on a trip to Hawaii, and I've decided not to go with them. Obviously, this is because I'm a spoiled brat, and I am too good for Hawaii.

But really it's because I don't like Hawaii. It's so... immodest. The cities are loud and smelly, built for tourists with way too much money. And the small towns where people actually live are all boisterous about their heritage. Yes, I get it, you guys have a rich and colorful culture. Yes, your history is both beautiful and tragic. I know. And there is nothing relaxing about lying on a crowded beach. Though, I rather like the ukulele.

In fact! I'm gonna go practice my ukulele right now!

I've been waking up at 11am. This is different from my usual waking up at 8am, but lately I've been having some terrible insomnia. Even if I go to bed at 10, I don't fall asleep until 2 in the morning. Not that I've been going to bed at ten, that is nearly impossible for a teen on summer break.

AUGH WAIT forget what I was going to say! My long-lost shark shirt has returned to me! Fuck yeah! It's totally lying on my floor in a pile of clean laundry. When did that get there?! I haven't seen you in almost a year! Yes, I love you shark shirt... It's an XL shirt, so it keeps finding its way into my dad's laundry. He never notices it until he runs low on shirts, and then he goes "Wtf, this isn't mine," and puts it in the laundry to be washed. Where it will again go into his pile of clothes. But this time, it has returned to me! I am going to be wearing this shirt all week.

That shark shirt is baisically the only good thing to have ever come out of Hawaii.

Shark Shirt!