Sunday, November 30, 2008

Stop Matriciding!

It goes like this:

On one hand, I would very much like to have an exciting death. Go out with a bang, y'know? Not just something drastic, like a murder, but something that would make a good crime drama. Maybe something like... I get killed by a runaway Ferris wheel, and the clown did it. It took four guys and a hooker to pull off, and one other person got stabbed in the back because of it.

Exciting. Unusual.

But on the other hand, I'd be really pissed off to have an exciting death. My reaction would not only be "OH GOD OH GOD," but also "So, this is how it will end. This would make for a good story." And then I'll be pissed off because I won't be able to write about it later. Something truly amazing happens to me, and I'm too dead to do anything about it. How obnoxious!

Augh! The very idea of it is making me angry.

Friday, November 28, 2008

The Caviar Cavalier

So after painting the drinking room a color that is slightly less white and slightly more yellow, we bought more plants to place inside there. We had the get rid of the plants originally there, as Kelly identified them to be the world's second most deadly plant. Our house was crawling with these toxic plants, and we have cats that are likely to chew on them. And this was the sort of plant that all you needed to do was chew on it to die of suffocation (but if you swallowed, you'd go septic and then have kidney failure if you lived long enough). So now we have more plants that are completely unidentified, and could be deadly, but they are there with their dirt and pots nonetheless.

The problem here is that our cats are obsessed with the dirt inside these pots.

So everyday for the past three days, we have been finding piles of dirt surrounding these plants. At first, it was just a light spattering of dirt. But as the days went on, the piles became larger. I just cleaned up a pile of dirt that could have been used to start a little seedling. And the plants gradually have less and less dirt, and deeper and deeper holes bored into them. So my mother and I placed aluminum foil around the plants, covering the dirt, hoping the crinkling and weird textures would deter the cats until we could make it to the store to buy rocks to place over the dirt.

Also: The family came and left for Thanksgiving. I ate lots, and am still full. (I am actually pretty empty, but I am feeling nauseous, so if anyone asks tell them I am full.) We watched Wall-E, and then Kung Fu Panda. We also watched the Seahawks lose the game (which is sad, since they are my team. We suck.) and watched the cats play. I was given a lot of advice as a young adult about to enter into university, a lot of which I wish I could forget.

... What kind of advice is that?! "Listen up. My dad didn't want me moving so far away for school. So you know what I did? I got a 45-year-old boyfriend. I was outta there!"

No no no! I will stick to boys my age that I love.
That is the sort of advice I should be hearing.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008


Ahh! We cut that bit with the dancing walls from the play. I am rejoicing.

So I've had Turn Back, O Man stuck in my head ever since I left the stage. It's my second favorite song in the play. My first being that one whose name I don't know... But I call it the Puppet Master song, because of the way they dance. Anywho, these songs wouldn't be so horrible to have in my head if I just knew the lyrics. You see, I can't understand a single word they sing for most of the songs. So I'm all walking around, trying to sing it, and I fall flat after four words. It's so... uncomfortable.

Turkey day tomorrow! The grandparents dined with us tonight at a lovely bistro. Tomorrow, we dine at home! They were excited to meet our cats, and grandma brought me a turkey plush that gobbles when you squeeze it. We gossiped about relatives, ate way too sweet cookies, and they left eventually.

I missed my show, so I'm a bit sour about the experience.

Bed now! I've been wanting to sleep before 10 all week, but with no luck.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Faster in a Fast World

So the grandparents are coming over! They shall be here tomorrow. And the cousins will soon follow after! They shall be here Thursday, but whether or not they'll be in time for dinner is a mystery. And then other adults I do not know will show up! All on Thursday.

We're having a turkey-day bash, I guess. It's been a while since we've had turkey with the family.

So many people entering the house means that we need to clean up the house. Having the grandparents come over means we need to sterilize the house. SO WE HAVE BEEN CLEANING. I've cleaned my room up some, but it is still messy by most people's standards. But then, what is it for Kelly standards? It is sparkling. I can see my floor, and lie down on it, and walk across it in the dark at night. I also do not break things anymore when I move about. It is nice to own unbroken things.

Tech rehearsal for the play was today! I had thought that it was an hour later than it actually was, so I went home to prepare food. I had this large bowl of steaming noodles, as well as a nice mug of steaming tea, when I received a call and found myself going 60 on a 45mph road. I came home later and the food was cold and bitter.

Tech rehearsal was stressful for me! I don't even know why. I think it's the blasted moving walls that get to me. Moving them forward and back at random intervals is no problem, I can even deal with the hot dog cart trying to take out all the actors as it swivels dangerously about, but when I have to dance with those walls...! Clough shouts "No, Kelly! You have it backwards!" Emily shouts "No, Kelly, you need to go faster!" "Jessie shouts "FUUUCK KELLY YOU KINDA HIT MY FOOT NOT REALLY!" because Jessie speaks in all caps and is an offensive and foul-mouthed person. (She is a good friend of mine.)

My problems with the walls went as such:
- They weight more than me. They weigh more than me. You have to understand that I am moving my legs at full speed, but my feet are slipping and not gaining any traction. So pardon me while I ice skate on my side of the stage. I can go no faster! You must slow down!
- STOP CHANGING THE CHOREOGRAPHY and maybe I won't do it backwards!
- Fuck you guys for being in my way. I am blindly moving a wall forward, and I need to not hit the band or the actors, meaning I must move an awkward diagonal. You try driving a car with a blindfold on, and then take a tight corner. And then when you finish turning, drive sideways and do it again! ON YOUR SIDE! YOU MAY NOT GO FORWARD! TURN FUCKING NOW. YOU HIT GRANDMA AND HER GUITAR!

Augh. I'm okay with Clough telling me what's wrong with what I'm doing, but not the other techie. She has it super easy with her wall, only needing to go straight forward. And she weighs more than me. She has no problem moving the stupid wall in intricate circles.

But Clough dislikes the effect of the dancing walls. So he may cut it. Which will be grand.

I made pumpkin pie today! I am not so great at making pie crusts (especially not this crumbly whole-wheat kind. I'll stick to the normal stuff, thanks). But I am good at the filling part. They are in the oven now, and I will be asleep when they finish cooking. Custard pies take a long time to cook.

Gee, I would like to avoid school tomorrow. But I have tech rehearsal again, and this time it will be going on super long. We need to practice that magic trick with Jesus. And I tend to give a lot of rides home, so I won't be back until and hour after it ends. Which makes me sad.

Monday, November 24, 2008


Today would have been great! If I wasn't feeling so tired.

Not that I regret being tired. I'm really quite used to it now.

Actually, it really wasn't being tired that put a dent in my day, it was a significant-yet-not-so-significant event that took place just after the final bell rang for school. It happened like this:

Kelly is experiencing extreme joy as she hoists her backpack onto her shoulder. School is freaking out for the day, and she plans to enjoy it.
That Kid Who Wears The Same Thing Everyday: (Enters Kelly's classroom and blocks the door.)
Kelly: (Crestfallen) Excuse me, I need to get by.
TKWWTSTE: (Moves aside) Oh yeah, sorry.
Kelly: (Trudges through the exit, defeated)


I held a slight conversation with That Kid Who Makes Me Angry Everyday.
I NEED CONSOLATION. (I did not wish to ever speak to him.)

But today was still pretty awesome. I totally found my lost thumbdrive. Which is great! I missed it these past couple months. Also, we paid off my glasses, so I'll be getting them pretty soon. I am excited to be able to see things slightly more clearly. I think I also don't look so terrible in them, so expect a picture post of Kelly's four eyes.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Like So

Why are we still out of cereal?! This angers me!

Freakin' love cereal.

So one of the techies dropped out of the play. And I will be replacing them! This means that most of my after-school free-time brought on by the extra-early dismissals accompanied by conferences will be taken up by being a techie in preparation for the play. This also means I will not be able to watch the play be performed opening night.

And, sadly, this also means I will have less free time. This is the biggest blow.

(I miss having free time.)

I bought a book today and it has words in it. I plan to read a vast majority of those words. I am excited for this, as I enjoy the way the words are put together, and I think the craftsmanship in the sentences is simply delightful. I also very much enjoy the carpenter of this book. He is not Jesus, but he is quite gay, and his name is Oscar Wilde. Which brings me to my next point:

Oscar Wilde has a way with T-H-E-A-T-E-R.
(Much like how Oscar Mayer has a way with B-O-L-O-G-N-A.)

Of course, as I sing this song, a delightful chap helps me discover that "Oscar Wilde has a way with AL-WAYS-BE-ING-SUCH-A-DOUCH."

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Bubblegum Bomb

Oh my God I have nothing to say. Today was so nothing.

I woke up kinda late. We're out of cereal, so I ate the last bagel. Jessie and I made it to school on time. I read H.P. Lovecraft all during Photography. We took a walk during history. I'm casted in the play we're reading in Dramatic Lit. I had pizza for lunch. Senior Social Studies was astoundingly boring. I made the whole class wait for me to finish my work in Japanese (I never finished. So Sean and Louis had a free day). I caught That Kid Who Wears the Same--NO WAIT THIS IS FREAKING ME OUT SO I AM SHARING.

I don't know if you remember That Kid Who Wears the Same Thing Everyday, but I certainly do since I see him now two to three times in the hallway daily. He's always wearing the same damn thing, and it makes me angry. His outfit has gotten classier from last year, but he stills wears the one thing all the time. I would punch him if he wasn't about a foot taller than me.

Anywho, I keep catching him looking at me in the hallways. And it freaks me right the fuck out. I don't want those unwashed eyes peering in my direction. It goes like this: I sweept the hallways for a face I might now. I see that stupid bright-green hat of his sticking out above everyone, and then his face awkwardly jerks away. I've seen RaeLynn make that exact same motion when Cody B or Ryan F would glance in her direction. And she practically made love shrines to them.

So the plan is to ignore this kid completely, and maybe he'll go away like a bad headache.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Optigonally Yours

Today I finalized the frames I'll be getting for my glasses. They are nothing like the ones I was looking at earlier. They are the opposite of round; they are so square they have 90-degree angle corners. Okay, I'm exaggerating the corners, but only a little bit which is the freaky part. Amber had me try on a pair in that style, and everything just looked balanced. Though, I hate how glaringly obvious glasses look on my face. And I hate how I've yet to find a pair that improve my already glorious looks. And they don't make me look smarter, they just bring out the geek in me.

Augh! I look like a dweeb in glasses.

But then there's this little motto of mine: I love how I don't have to look at me all the time. I'll wear my glasses when I'm not near mirrors, and am instead near books, and will bask in the comfort and clarity they bring to my eyes.

(I am being so over-dramatic about wearing glasses. They'd be totally optional if I didn't read so very much and do so much artwork. I shouldn't fuss so much.)

Then after picking out frames, we went to the video game store right next door. I love the locations of those two stores, since you know avid gamers are prone to eye problems from ogling back-lit screens. Just like that sex toy shop that's right next to a mattress store. It works. I started to gather together the two items I wanted to buy, when I noticed my lack of wallet. I had forgotten it at home. Which was tragic, because I so very much wanted that Zelda GBA game.

Oh! Okayso. I must have been in a coma during the entire GBA period of gaming, because I have no knowledge of GBA games. I've only ever owned one, and it was Hamtaro. So I'm looking at all their used GBA games and freaking out because I never knew these games existed. Home Alone?! Harry Potter?! Pokemon?! ZELDA?! HOW DID I NOT HEAR ABOUT THIS?! And my brother's GBA library was full of war-strategy games, which I dislike. So it's like... where was I?

Augh. I feel the need to re-live portable gaming. I simply must!

Monday, November 17, 2008


So this is my 100th post! I've been avoiding writing it because I have nothing special planned. But now I'm all like, just get it out of the way so you'll go back to regular updates.

Here I go.

So, like any normal teenage girl in a relationship after watching a chick flick about weddings, I've begun planning my own wedding. Just as I have no skills in interior decorating, I have no skills in planning a wedding. I haven't even thought about details like location, or dates, I just have planned out one section that's really important.

You know that part in the wedding, during the ceremony, when the music starts, and everyone stands up and turns to look at the bride? And she slowly walks up with the important male figure in her life, to the beat of the music. Dah~ dat dah dahh. Dah~ DAT dah dahh! She finally reaches the other side of the church, and they begin their vows.

Yeah. This is how it'll go down with me and Griff:

So the music starts, and everyone stands up. Then--BLAM! I kick open the doors and bust my way into the room (or whatever). I'll fucking fly down the runway, wedding dress and all, and tackle Griffin. Because I'm so sick of being separated from him. My father will still be on the other side of the church, slowly making his way up, and the plaster on the walls will probably be chipped from the impact of the doors. Not to mention the heel print in the doors themselves.

Then you know how during their vows, the couple is standing like, three feet away from eachother? C'mon, now, you're gonna spend the rest of your life with that person. Get cozy. At my wedding, my hands'll be all over Griff the entire time. The preist'll be all "Ahem. Ahem!" and one of us'll have to gasp for air and say "Yeah... Yeah! I do." It'll be time to kiss the bride, and we're already practically making babies.

Kiss the bride? Pssht, been there, done that!

We'll still be at the altar when we realize it's time for us to make our getaway into the limo. Instead of waiting for everyone to shower us with rice and shit, I'll just throw my bouquet at them, my garter will already be off, and we'll have the groomsmen and bridesmaids in charge of the gifts and cake at the reception. 'Cuz Griff and I? We're leaving for our honeymoon right then and there. Screw receptions.

And that is why I want a tiny wedding. I don't want gramma to see me humping my very-nearly-husband. But close friends and parents? They'll laugh it off. Yeah. They better.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008


I just wasted my entire day on this website.

It went from 11:06 AM to 4:35 PM pretty fast.

I think I had something I needed to do, but I've completely forgotten about any responsibilities I might have. I think... I think I needed to fill out and mail some... forms...

I spent Saturday with my friends celebrating this occurrence. We went to the Seattle Science Center. Or Pacific Science Center. Anywho, there is a dinosaur exhibit, and I smushed a penny and imprinted the design of a stegosaurus onto it. I also bought a formerly-known-as-the-brontosaurus (apatosaurus) plushie, while my friends bought things like plush puppies and plush kittens and spinney balls. (I am a proud geek.) Also, my Apato's name is Jack. I think it is fitting. We also got some stickers in the shape of things like planets, celestial bodies, and spacecraft. We got to see Lucy, which was actually rather boring for the amount we paid. An exciting part was finding out that Rae can throw a ball 55mph. (My max was something like 27 or 32mph.) No butterflies landed on us, and the Queen Bee has eluded us once again. We got to touch a sheep brain. They are remarkably heavy for their size.

It didn't rain, and everything was grossly overpriced. But we had wicked fun.

(Last year, we went to an art museum for my birthday. I personally believe that one should live a life of constant learning, so I try to catch up annually.)

I am excited for Sunday, because Animal Crossing: City Folk comes out. I always do this. A couple weeks before an Animal Crossing game comes out, I become over excited and spend my life trying to figure out all the little details of the game before it is released. I have wonderful memories of eleven-year-old Kelly using her (extremely) limited Japanese skills to read an article about Animal Crossing for the N64. (This was before the GameCube.) I think I dedicated my entire summer that year to Animal Crossing.

I still play Animal Crossing for the GC. Even though it has been about five years. It is not my original town (I deleted the original in a furious fit). I also lost my copy of Wild World over a summer vacation (along with all of my other DS games.) So I am so stoked for this new game to come out, because I want to not only play it, but treasure it and not fucking lose it like all the other games. I lose memories when I lose those games! I hope I get Tabby in my town again. Or Kabuki, he's pretty boss. Agent S is confirmed, I need her in my town. And Pudge. But only if he's gay, I really enjoy gay Pudge.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Optical Correction

According to my Blogger Dashboard, this is my 100th post! But according to you, it is not.

(Sorry for not posting often this week.)

So my pupils are totally dilated right now. It really isn't so bad, actually, my right eye only looks dilated and I can see just fine. But my left eye! Oh boy, it's still huge and blurry. I keep covering up my left eye so I can look at things. I feel like a pirate. Yarr! It's super obnoxious, to be blunt. I wish it would just stop.

My eyes are dilated because I went to the eye doctor's. As it turns out, I am a little bit far sighted. It's only minute, but it's enough that I noticed and went to have it checked out. So I'll be getting glasses. They won't be for full time, though, they'll only be reading glasses. I picked out a couple frames that I liked, but I kind of want to drag a friend over to the eye place and have them tell me what they think. I actually look pretty good in emo glasses, but I worry I might look pretentious. I also found a pair that are the sort of glasses a blond male doctor in a shojo manga might wear that look pretty good on me. But then I worry they're too masculine, as I tend towards the masculine side of fashion. (I have enough trouble with looking like a boy when my hair is pulled back and my bangs hidden!) And those are the only two frames in existence that look okay on me, I swear to God. I don't look good in glasses. I need a second opinion.

At least they're only reading glasses. I don't have to make a life-changing decision.

So! My birthday is tomorrow. I am excited, since I will be turning 18. I'd be happier, but everyone I know is currently severely depressed. Two of my friends broke down in hysterics today in school. I'm expecting more drama tomorrow, as well. The stress of my friends' problems combined with my own has left me with a lingering nausea, and if it weren't for the fact that I detest crying in front of people I might have bawled along with them. But that would have involved offloading my problems, and today was a day to focus on them. We can talk about what ails Kelly at a later date, perhaps when everyone else is feeling cheery.

Then! Then THEY'LL know how it feels to have a glorious sunny day ruined by someone else's raincloud! Ha-HAH! (I am so sick of being happy when everyone else is sad. Cheer up, emo friends.)