Tuesday, April 14, 2009


WOW my Senior Composition teacher really respects me. We had a little conference today, just her and I, to discuss my grade and check off some assignments.

Teachers don’t give enough praise to their students nowadays, but I think it’s really important that they do. If you think your teacher likes you, you are more willing to do your work and work harder at it. I’ve had more teachers mock me and belittle me than I have had praise me. I wonder… do you think I would have done better in school if my teachers weren’t all such bastards?

Fifth grade was such a horrible year for me. There was that hair stylist randomly cutting off all of my hair, I nearly died to a common ailment, and I don’t think I had ever had such little will to go to school. I swear to God, my math teacher was bullying me. I never liked him to begin with, but then he pulled me aside after class just to mock me, and then tried to tell my parents I was illiterate (and should be held back). I had never hated a teacher so much.

I never did any of my class work that year. I just didn’t want to. As a punishment, I was to stay inside during recess until I was all caught up. I had recess maybe four times that year. My teacher (my regular teacher, that is. We had three teachers: Reading, Math, and everything else. My reading and math teacher were the same person) thought he had me all figured out, and decided that my parents were beating me at home, and that the kids made fun of me during recess. So he thought he was doing me a favor, telling me to just stay inside. But I really just wanted to go out and play with my friends.

You know, I think just about the only reason I didn’t kill my self (I seriously considered it) was because of my friends. Asia and Sarah were both in my class, along with a few other kids that I don’t quite remember the names of. And in math, I sat next to Louis and Bubba, and they were great distractions from my awful teacher. I think they were also in my reading class. But I remember sitting by myself in reading. And also, when I had recess, I’d get to see Amber. Since I had moved the year before, we went from neighbors to strangers, but seeing her was still a treat.

Oh! Another reason that year was awful: Amber and I got into a nasty fight, and we didn't speak for over a year. It was totally my fault. Not to mention it was that year my parents decided I wasn't allowed to go visit Jessica anymore. I haven't seen her since. I worry a lot that she is dead.

I'm trying pretty hard to find a silver lining in all of this. But even my luck in love was crappy that year. The boy I had a crush on got his first girlfriend that year, and the boy I absolutely hated turned out to have a crush on me. (I had completely forgotten about this until now.) I think it was also then that my mom got addicted to Runescape, and started ignoring her family. And I'll bet that was the year our cat Wedger died.

Fifth grade was so terrible that I decided to go to a different school for sixth grade. Things started getting better from there.

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