Day by Day

What is this, am I masochistic? I'm all like "Oooh--chocolate mousse. Om nom nom! Chocolate milk! Drink! What's that? A bag of M&M's? Devour!" I shouldn't eat chocolate like that. Now I kinda want to curl up and die.

Or drink plain milk. God, I miss milk that's not fat free.

And now it sounds like I'm on a diet. A diet of conquest. I feel an urge to become great in some way. Like a billowy cape, evil laugh, minions sort of great. I think that little Star Wars production we are putting on is getting to my head. I play Chancellor Palpatine, and there's this scene where I'm all "Yess, my pet, submit to me. Let me use you to my will." And my pet even gets all down on his knees and begs. I could get used to that. But I kind of fail as a dominatrix--I don't like that black leather look. And I'm not into bondange. So it's like, I want the power, but I don't want the style. Sigh. What's a girl to do?

Everything smells like cat pee. I'll sit and watch TV downstairs, and WHAM! I smell cat pee. But when I go and look for a pee stain, none exist. I even get down and dirty with a blacklight, but I find nothing. So then, at school in Photography, I sit in this easy chair and BAM! Everything smells like cat pee. What the fuck? Is it the chair? I don't know. Maybe it's that kid next to me. So I go and stand in a well-ventilated area and WHOOF! Nothing at all smells like cat pee. And it's nice, and I can relax. Until I get home and sit on that couch that smells like cat pee! I'm starting to wonder if it might be me. Do I smell like cat pee? Maybe my nose is working incorrectly, and it's thinking everything is cat pee.

The world is made of cat pee.

Call backs for the play were today. We sat around and sang. I have zero problem making an absolute fool of myself in front of people, but as it turns out I can't sing for an audience. So I tanked today, since I couldn't get my voice under control. I sang like a chicken, and I thought it was hilarious. So tomorrow I see if I made it into the play or not, and I'm kind of excited. I pretty much doubt I got a part, but I'm really curious to see how Jessie did. She has a glorious voice, but is afraid to use it, and she can act really well. It's like, she has so much potential for this play, but is the director willing to work to make her shine? Anyhow, I might volunteer my time to work behind scenes, and I'm definately auditioning for the next play.

DollHouse is the next play. We read it in Dramatic Literature this year. I hope it's good.